MyEgoTripped

Okie dokie.

So, to anyone who pays attention and wants to know I was really active on DA here till Oct 2019.

At that time I had been on EI and has a tiny bit of an inheritance so I was coasting for a bit and took that time to come up with my SFFDP comic with Freak-Ella and Stickabella.

And it was going good and I was creatively driven...until October when things slowly began to change and fall apart.

First I was part way through my next comic page when my computer died and couldn't afford a good enough one to do art on anymore. But then I got a job, which was great and I still have it, but it’s a graveyard shift one that is quite taxing on my time and body, and as I was trying to adjust to that, and then 4 month later is when Covid hit and I was already isolated as it was but that really pushed it into overdrive. Work became an exhausting blur and I just had no energy left on my time off other than to rest and recover.

On top of that was a growing problem family wise, someone I cared about was struggling with the shittiest luck and I felt responsible to help out. But its drained me mentally and emotionally and I was often freaked out something happened when this person would disappear for months and any money I tried to saved went to help out and I was always in debt with nearly nothing to depend on.

And this is how it went for the next few years, no change, no energy, no money and slowly no hope.

I was reaching a breaking point.

I did try to do another comic page, but every attempt died as I had nothing in me left to offer.

I was basically waiting to just coast to the day I would die.

2023 is when things began to change. Started the same but the family problem escalated until I let this person stay with me and discovered there was serious mental illness as the root of all the problems and that began to be clear around June. And I tried to help but any attempt was meet with a hostile nasty personality that would lash out and abuse me, and behave in ways that were toxic to all the people around me and scared me and them.

And I broke, I realized I can help someone that refuses to help themselves and I kicked this person who had been in my life for over 40 years for the last time out of my life right around my birthday in July.

And I’ve been recovering from the anger and hurt of that since, slowing building back who I used to be.

And on the opposite side of all that, there were different life changes which also reach a climax on my birthday about what is going on with my new girlfriend who is someone I met here on DA nearly 10 years ago.

That and my comic and art plans update in the next Journal update soon.